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– How to Productively Deal with Exam Stress
– Creative Ways to Save Money as a Student
As many of y’all know, I transferred from a large public school after my freshman year of college to what is now the school of my dreams- Vanderbilt University.
Only when I transferred did I realize the drastic difference between Greek Life at public schools and Greek Life at private schools, and furthermore uncovered the misconceptions I had held about Greek Life in general.
Sweeping generalizations I had made about the kind of people that were in Greek Life were soon proved to be incorrect as I began to build honest and amazing relationship with new friends who happened to be in Greek Life.
I found that many of the girls I connected with happened to be in greek life also, but it didn’t consume their entire lives and it certainly was not their entire identities.
I was convinced that the sorority life, one which I thought was consumed by fake friendships, gossip, and partying, was not for me
I was encouraged to try out the recruitment process and just see if it was something that I liked. My friends assured me that I could drop at anytime if I wanted to, and that the process would in the least bring me closer to existing friends or help me make new ones.
I begrudgingly came back to school a few days early after winter break, bracing myself for two weeks of pressure.
Honestly, the experience sucked. It was what I thought it would be- two weeks of unnecessary pressure and stress….. but in the process, I did
– Get closer to my existing friends who also were rushing
– Refine my conversation and small talk skills
Even if I hadn’t ended up with the sorority that I loved, I wouldn’t completely regret the process, as it did help me get closer to new people and existing friends.
What the Week Looked Like.....
The structure of Rush week differs from school to school. Regardless of if the process is just over a few days or over an entire week, the “rounds” of recruitment are consistent.
You start the process visiting all the sororities present at your school, and then each day you go back to less and less houses.
The houses you are called back to are based off a “mutual selection process”. After each day, you rank the houses in order of preference, and they also preference the girls they want to call back.
This process is inherently flawed. Most people dispute the validity of the “mutual selection”.
I don’t know much about the recruitment process from the sorority’s part, but I do know that the process doesn’t work for everyone nor is it fair. I happened to get lucky, but I know this isn’t always the case!
General Tips...
– Dress for YOURSELF! Stop thinking of what others will like and think about what you will feel most comfortable and most yourself in.
– Don’t talk about the three B’s: Boys, Booze, Bank Accounts
– Don’t pay attention to stupid rankings that are perpetuated by frat boys and online forums. They don’t matter and truly are so misrepresentative of each sorority!
– Keep your mind open. Try not to have your heart set on one sorority from the onset, because there’s honestly a large chance that you won’t end up there.
Talking Points
In the above section, I talked about the three B’s:
- Boys
- Booze
- Bank Accounts
Some people go into the sorority rush process knowing that they want to join at least in part due to the party/social life. Because of this, they go into rush week and start conversations about boys, partying, drinking, etc. Because this is NOT what sorority life is about at its core, it is super untasteful to talk about these things during rush. In all honesty, if you are rushing for the social scene/partying, you can get that without joining a sorority. You should be joining because you are geniunely interested in the sisterhood!
Though the three B’s rule is helpful, I find it more helpful to talk about what you SHOULD talk about rather than what you shouldn’t.
To parallel those three B’s, I like to think of three P’s to help guide your conversations. These three P’s are:
- Passions
- What do you love to do? What can you not stop talking about? Share it!
- Pursuits
- What are you doing right now or what have you done in the past that embodies your passions? Do you have a YouTube channel? Do you want to travel the world? What’s your dream job?
- Philanthropy
- What causes are you passionate about? If you can’t think of any… then girl you gotta reevaluate lol.
My Takeaways....
The process is one of LUCK. It really sucks for many girls, but at the same time is a segway for many others to find some of the best friends they will ever make.
I was lucky to be of the latter party, but I know many of my friends who did not have positive experiences.
It is so important to realize your worth during this entire, sucky process. Like I said, it is a process of luck. If you don’t get called back to a place you felt great at, that does not mean anything about you or your character.
You are always enough and perfect just as you are. Whether you join a sorority or not, if you are social and make a point to step out of your comfort zone, you will make life long friendships in college.
